Tuesday, August 17, 2010

MY LAMENT


For the past few months now I've watched quite a few people I love and care about do foolish things with money.

I talk about my dismay with my immediate family but otherwise TRY very hard to keep my comments and opinions to myself.

This is where the talent of 'just smile and nod' comes in handy.

I get it, I really do:

I KNOW this isn't any of my business.

I KNOW this is my problem.

I KNOW that I have an issue with money that isn't going to go away anytime soon.

It's simply my lament and for the time being, it would seem I just can't help it.

I get angrier and angrier...but I say very little to nothing to the ones in question (and there are multiple) and I admit that I'm struggling to find meaning and understanding behind it all.

Perhaps I'm not meant to.

*Smile and nod, Jo. Smile and nod.*

I'm always afraid the look of utter disapproval and disappointment on my face will betray my thoughts:

"Did you really just buy that when you have other more important priorities?"

"Wasn't it just this side of two weeks ago when you were worried about how this-n-that was going to get paid?

Did shopping in excess for things you don't really need change all that?"

All leading to the following questions for myself:

Have I mis-understood this whole time?

Have I got it wrong?

Is this the secret of life and happiness?

Where was I -- did I miss the cue?

What am I not seeing here?

And finally, when, if at all, is it my business to say anything?

Never. It's simply not my place and I know I have to let it go.

I don't know much, but I do know what broke is. Many people do, not just me.

We know what it is to struggle to buy a package of hot dogs.

We know the difference between needing something and wanting something.

That is the lesson I took away from last year.

I'm now 44 years old and I had to learn that the hard way. I save up for the things I want.

I'd like to sit down and teach them these lessons but I know you can't teach these things.

You either know it and already live it, or you have to learn the same way I did -- and hope to God they don't wind up taking the same course.

It's all about balance -- and it took me decades to find mine. Learn from me.

If not, then just please don't show me all your unnecessary 'loot' one week and then tell me you're broke and/or that you can't pay a bill the next.

I can only keep my big mouth shut and my thoughts to myself for so long -- and your lament at that moment may very well be the one that pushes mine over the edge.

Let's not tempt it, shall we?

Peace, serenity & balance.


*EDIT: Just posted a new recipe on my 'Rabbit Food' blog --feel free to grab my 'Rabbit Food' blog button located on my side bar. :)

6 comments:

Steven Anthony said...

I agree my friend...sometimes saying nothing is best, but so damn hard....once again my friend you've said it perfectly.

Steven Anthony
Man Dish~Metro Style

Meeko Fabulous said...

OMG . . . Girl . . . I couldn't have said it better myself . . . I go through the same thing with a certain tenant . . . You can afford to go buy a new outfit and eat out all the time and go out for drinks . . . But you can't afford to pay your rent on time??? Honey . . . I HAD to tell her the other day that THAT is NOT how the world works. I can't call my mortgage company and tell them they're going to have to wait until Thursday . . . It just doesn't work that way. Usually, I wouldn't say anything, but if I don't . . . No one is going to tell her. Everyone's so tired and annoyed with her that they avoid coming over altogether now if she's going to be there. Sad, huh? ANYWHO . . . Yea, just smile and nod. Smile and nod. Some people have to learn life's lessons on their own. No matter how much we'd like to save them from it. ::sigh::

Jo said...

Meeko, my love--you are so right! Time, perhaps, to show that girl to the curb. Brutal, I know. Hard knocks and all -- but things would have turned out much differently for me had I had someone to pull my head out of my ass years ago when I needed it.

Sounds like you're the right guy for the job. ;)

Love you!

Green Monkey said...

Jo...I too am falling way behind on (reading)my favorite blogs. always sooo refreshing to read you! once again, you are right on! I for one have NEVER been good at keeping my opinions to myself.

Jeanne said...

It's tough watching people make the same mistakes we've made, but everyone has to learn their own lessons in their own time, and our culture revolves around stuff, creating a constant lure to overspend.

(Says the woman who now earns approximately half what she used to, but still wants to spend at the same levels. Sigh.)

AKAmamma said...

This is my first visit to your blog, and there are so many things I love about it. It feels like a breath of fresh air. Heather