Friday, February 26, 2010
SO, A THERAPIST WALKS INTO A BAR
Just got back. One session and I already need a nap and he a drink.
We spoke mostly of what initially brought me here and I had to go through the whole rigmarole of last year with the old attorney and the bankruptcy qualifications, the garnishment, the damned near poverty we found ourselves in and the toll it took that I just can't seem to rid myself of.
He asked me a few questions trying to decipher from my incessant rambling (a nervous habit) if I'm fearful of life in general and what that means in terms of diagnosis:
Are you afraid to leave your house?
Are you having trouble finding joy in things you did before?
Do you sleep well?
Have any medical conditions?
I have a rare neurological disorder called 'Glossopharyngeal Neuralgia'.
*This is something I'll share with you all another time. In the meantime, feel free to copy and paste it in Google search, if you're so inclined, and ask me any questions you like. Right now it's dormant (very similar to the relapse and remit form of MS).
What do you mean am I irritable???? Just what are you insinuating? How would you like me to take that clipboard and bomp you over your head????
Um, okay, yeah.
I jest. He was actually very nice and after a few more questions and musings about my life (again, to the person who was hateful to me on here a few days ago, you only know what I choose to share!), he actually made me feel better by saying; "It's amazing you've held up this well" and found me able to state my issues articulately. What I referred to as my 'incessant rambling', he called normal, especially under the circumstances.
He basically said 'it's no wonder' and shook his head in what I saw as sincere sympathy.
Crazy? Not as of yet anyway.
Anxious however? You bet.
It would seem I have 'General Anxiety Disorder (G.A.D.)', mixed with depression, a diagnosis that did not surprise me and will not go away overnight, but he assured me I will start to feel better in time with continued therapy and meds.
I'm generalizing his statements in broad terms, of course, but suffice it to say that he was very empathetic. Nice to have someone validate your feelings who has no biased connections to you -- only a strangers objectivity.
'Wikipedia' describes G.A.D. as "an anxiety disorder that is characterized by excessive, uncontrollable and often irrational worry about everyday things that is disproportionate to the actual source of worry. This excessive worry often interferes with daily functioning, as individuals suffering GAD typically anticipate disaster, and are overly concerned about everyday matters such as health issues, money, death, family problems, friend problems, relationship problems or work difficulties.They often exhibit a variety of physical symptoms, including fatigue, fidgeting, headaches, nausea, numbness in hands and feet, muscle tension, muscle aches, difficulty swallowing, bouts of difficulty breathing, trembling, twitching, irritability, sweating, insomnia, hot flashes, and rashes. These symptoms must be consistent and on-going, persisting at least 6 months, for a formal diagnosis of GAD to be introduced. Approximately 6.8 million American adults experience GAD."
So, what I want to know is who the hell from Wiki has been peeking through my windows?????
I have another appointment with him next Friday and after that I have one more free session.
From there the money is out of pocket unless I can find someone more affordable.
However, let me state that I really like this therapist (plus, the thought of stating everything all over again with another therapist is exhausting) and was very comfortable. Ed is concerned, as am I (GREATLY), about the money but I have his support if we can budget it. Our insurance will pay 80% of my visits only after $3,000 is spent out of pocket.
Gotta love our health care system.
Back later on my '90 Days' blog.
Happy Friday, all.