Friday, January 15, 2010
KILLING ME SOFTLY WITH HIS THONG
Now that I have your attention, this post really has nothing to do with thongs. Butt cracks, perhaps. Thongs, no -- I hope.
We're expecting the cable guy this morning. Well, 'this morning' being in the loosest sense: between 8:00 and noon.
I love the windows of time these people give you, but I have to admit it's better than the old; "We'll be there somewhere between the un-Godly early morning hours before you have a chance to throw on a bra or just as you're sitting down for the dinner you painstakingly made -- and kept warm -- for your hard working husband."
I've given up that Jim Carrey will actually show up and karaoke 'Somebody To Love' by Jefferson Airplane.
Instead, I'll be expecting the guy who seems oblivious that his unmentionables are showing as he bends over in his two sizes too small boxer briefs -- hopefully I'll be spared the 'crack-a-lackin' view I've become accustomed to.
In other news:
A week ago I had one of my back upper teeth pulled. That was fun. Nothing quite like listening to the sound of ones own tooth being broke apart in your mouth.
"Love conquers all things except poverty and toothache." ~Mae West
Since then, I've finished up my antibiotics and discovered by last Friday night that Vicodin and I do not a good match make. So, I've been sticking to Ibuprofen.
I've also been sticking close to the toilet as my stomach has been quite upset (and my mouth still quite sore).
At my follow up dental appointment yesterday, I was told that everything is progressing as it should (although, he did say that it takes 4 to 6 weeks for it to completely heal).
So, what gives?
I'm not allergic to any medication and have been following the medication guide lines (as well as gargling with warm salt water, etc.).
My body is simply decompressing and having trouble adjusting to the fact that things are actually okay now.
I need to somehow let my body know that while the perpetual knot in my stomach that has been with me through this year and a half was at first necessary, that I am indeed now okay and it can now go on to the next person in need.
I've become so dependent on this dull ache and while it's always difficult to say good-bye (after all, we've been through so much together), it's time I stand on my own two feet, sans the twisting knot in my stomach.
So, go forth and do good for another needy person. While I was grateful for your strength, continuity and presence in my life, your job here is done.
And dear knot, to prove I'm ready to move forward, I leave you with this song: